Payback

Fiction by Lauren Purnell

Phoebe Adams was handling her breakup brilliantly. She hadn’t even cussed her out in the hallway, or tried to key her car—and oh god, Phoebe wanted to. She wanted to punch walls and break things. Instead, she spent an hour sobbing on her bathroom floor, listening to Mitski. Then, Phoebe recruited her younger sister to help her dye her hair blue. Her mom kept knocking on her door, bringing her dinner or freshly baked chocolate chip cookies. But really, Phoebe was fine. 

She’d found them in the music room one day after school in a compromising position—Scarlett’s blouse was unbuttoned, and Abigail’s shirt was completely off. Phoebe’s hand gripped the door handle, and when the door creaked, the pair looked up. Nobody knew what to say; all Phoebe could do was leave. Scarlett had followed her out into the hallway, frantically fastening the buttons on her blouse. She kept calling out: “Phoebe, it’s not what you think.” Abigail was on her tail, but she wasn’t saying anything. She hadn’t even told Phoebe that she liked girls. What a rubbish way to find out, thought Phoebe.

There were so many people in the hallway that day, and Phoebe could not escape. The walls, lined with navy lockers, crowded in on her and she stumbled outside. Thankfully, she had a car, so she could leave school to escape her lying, cheating girlfriend. Had all of those mornings, afternoons, and midnights they’d spent together meant nothing to Scarlett?

Thankfully, she caught her girlfriend cheating on a Friday, so she had the weekend to piece herself together. Phoebe hardly had the courage to show her face on Monday. She considered transferring to a neighboring high school, but then she remembered her sister, Jess. Phoebe wanted to look out for her sister as long as she could, like an older sister should. 

“She was weird anyway,” said Jess, flipping through the Netflix catalog, her feet propped up on the edge of Phoebe’s bed. 

“But I loved her,” Phoebe choked out. 

“I know,” Jess said. “But she clearly doesn’t love you.” 

A loud sob came from Phoebe. When the tears didn’t stop, Jess tossed a tissue box toward her sister. 

Underneath the tears, her soul shook with anger. 

###

Phoebe clutched the steering wheel in anger on the drive to school that morning. Usually she loved to chat, or sing along to the songs on the radio, but today she was silent.

She floated through first period. She rendered herself invisible for second period. And during third period, which was her lunch, Phoebe sat in her car with a bag of cool ranch Doritos and a peanut butter sandwich. Ten minutes before the beginning of fourth period, Phoebe grabbed her bag and trekked back inside. When her stomach twisted in pain,  she ran to the bathroom and enclosed herself in a stall. 

Phoebe scrubbed her hands with soap. The accessible stall door swung open and hit the brick wall, just as Phoebe turned off the sink. 

The girl had jet black hair that landed just above her waist, and bags that covered her forehead and framed her face. She sauntered to the sink, washed her hands, and adjusted her baggy jeans and black baby tee, and nodded at Phoebe. “Hey.” 

Phoebe hadn’t realized she was staring until now. She averted her eyes. “Hi,” she choked out. 

“Sorry about you and Scarlett,” the girl said, after a beat. 

Phoebe’s head snapped up. “How did you know that?” 

“I mean, it’s all over social media. Someone recorded it, and people have been sharing it with their own stupid commentary.” She paused. “You didn’t see it?” 

Phoebe’s mouth opened and closed like a fish. She never expected to be the subject of this week’s gossip. Phoebe hated it. “I—no, I didn’t. I don’t have any of those apps.” 

The girl adjusted her bangs. “Oh.” Then—“I’m Charity. But you can call me Ari.” 

“I’m Phoebe.” 

Ari smirked. “I know. Why do you think I’m talking to you?” 

Phoebe crossed her arms. “Do you only talk to gossip victims or something?” 

“Well, only the ones I think are interesting.” Charity smiled, a less devious one this time. 

Phoebe awkwardly jabbed her thumbs toward the door. “Um, I should get to class.” 

Ari nods. “If you’d like company during lunch, I’ll be around. Sitting in your car gets lonely.” She winked, gave her hands one last flick, and left. 

Now Phoebe stood by herself in front of the mirror, feeling cold and awkward. She left for class.

###

After Calculus on Tuesday, Phoebe found Ari sitting at a picnic table in front of the school. She looked up from her laptop, squinting in the sun. “Hey,” Ari said. 

Phoebe simply sat down. She’d had a rough day. Classmates kept shifting their eyes between her and Abigail, who was in her English class. The people she made small talk with every morning were suddenly distant. Phoebe was an island. 

She felt Ari’s eyes on her. Phoebe met her eyes, clear and gray. “What?” 

“You should get them back.” 

Phoebe blinked. “What?” 

“Scarlett cheated on you. And Abby had the nerve to sleep with your girlfriend.” Ari closed her laptop. “So you should get them back.” 

Phoebe thought about her sisters, Jess and Lucy. Lucy greeted her in the driveway every day with a warm, tiny hug. She was eager to chat about Phoebe’s exciting life; Lucy had once said she wanted to grow up and be like Phoebe. Jess came to her for sound advice about friendship or acing classes, and Phoebe has never let her down. She couldn’t let them down. And if she chose revenge, how would it affect her sisters? 

She twisted the ends of her hair, which barely reached her wide shoulders. “I want to,” she said, “But I can’t.” 

“So you’re a coward is what I’m hearing.” 

Phoebe slammed her hand against the table. “No I’m not!” Then she pressed a hand to her mouth. Where did that come from? 

Ari seemed to know something Phoebe didn’t. She stared at Phoebe with a satisfied smile. “I think you’re perfectly capable of enacting revenge.” 

Phoebe sank into the hard, hole-filled picnic bench. She lowered her voice to a tone more calm, more like the real Phoebe. She didn’t recognize the person who shouted at Ari, just moments ago. “What makes you think that?” 

“Do I need to answer that?” 

Phoebe huffed. Ari really didn’t need to—she could sense the animosity building toward Scarlett and Abigail. She could absolutely tear them apart, given the right mood. The question was whether she should. The smiling faces of her sisters rotated in her mind. What kind of example would she set if she got revenge on every person who did her wrong? 

Phoebe pushed the responsible thoughts away, just for a moment, letting her curiosity take the lead. “And if I went along with what you just suggested,” Phoebe started, lowering her voice, “Then what?” 

  Ari squinted in the sun. “Do you have any embarrassing secrets about Scar or Abby?” 

Phoebe considered. She’d been friends with Abigail since kindergarten. They’d seen each other through everything—and with that came secrets that they swore they’d take to their grave. And she had given Scarlett her heart. Phoebe finally let herself fall in love, and Scarlett threw their relationship to the ground and stomped on it. 

Maybe, Phoebe thought to herself, It’s good to teach Lucy and Jess to stand up for themselves. 

It was time to burn whatever had been built in the past. Phoebe needed to cut ties with both of them. 

She ripped out a sheet of paper from her notebook and wrote down every confession, secret, and vice about Abigail and Scarlett. When Phoebe handed the paper to Ari, she grinned with mischief.